New Number

After directory assistance
gave me my boyfriend’s new telephone number,
I dialed him and got a woman. “Is Robert there?” I asked.
“He’s in the shower,” she responded.
“Please tell him his girlfriend called,” I said and hung up.

When he didn’t return the call, I dialed again.
This time a man answered. “This is Robert,” he said.

“You’re not my boyfriend!” I exclaimed.

“I know,” he replied.
“That’s what I’ve been trying
to tell my wife for the past half-hour.”


Josh Called

My daughter called me
at work to say I received
a call from “Josh” at the bank
regarding my account. So, I called
my bank and the operator asked me what
Josh’s last name was and I explained that
he hadn’t left his last name.

When she asked for his department,
I said that I didn’t know.

“There are 1500 employees in this building,
ma’am,” she told me rather sharply.

So I asked her for her name.

“Danielle,” she said.

“And your last name?” I asked.

“Sorry,” she replied,
“we’re not allowed to give last names.”


Blonde Cell Phone Jokes

Blonde Cell Phone Jokes

A young man wanted to get his
beautiful blonde wife something
nice for their first wedding anniversary.
So he decides to buy her a cell phone.
She is all excited, she loves her phone.
He shows her and explains to her all the
features on the phone.

The next day the blonde goes shopping.
Her phone rings and it’s her husband,
“Hi hun,” he says “How do you like your new phone?”

She replies “I just love it! It’s so small!!
Your voice is clear as a bell – But there’s one
thing I don’t understand though.”

“What’s that, baby?” asks the husband.

“How’d you know I was at Wal-Mart?”,
she quietly replied…

Ha Ha Ha Ha Hah!


Women Drivers Cell Phone Joke

I tell you, women drivers are a hazard to traffic.
Driving to work this morning on the freeway,
I looked over to my left and there was a woman
in a Mustang doing 65 miles per hour with her face
up next to her rear view mirror putting on her eyeliner!

I looked away for a couple seconds and
when I looked back she was halfway over in my lane.

It scared me so bad I dropped my electric shaver
in my coffee, and it spilled all over my cell phone!

Ha Ha Ha Ha Hah!


A Talkative Public Bathroom Cell Phone Joke

Leaving Minnesota for Colorado,
I decide to make a stop at one of
those rest areas on the side of the road.
I go in the washroom.
The first stall was taken
so I went in the second stall.
I just sat down when I hear a voice
from the next stall…

– “Hi there, how is it going?”

Okay, I am not the type to strike
conversations with strangers in washrooms
on the side of the road.
I didn’t know what to say so finally I say:

– “Not bad…”

Then the voice says:

– “So, what are you doing?”

I am starting to find that a bit weird, but I say:

– “Well, I’m going back to Colorado…”

Then I hear the person say all flustered:

– “Look I’ll call you back, every time I
ask you a question this idiot in the next
stall keeps answering me.”

Ha Ha Ha Ha Hah!


Lucille’s Cell Phone Joke

One of my friends works in the customer
service call center of a national pager company.
There, he deals with the usual complaints regarding
poor pager operation, as well as the occasional crank
caller demanding to be paged less often, more often,
or by more interesting people.

The best call came from Bubba,
who repeatedly complained that he keeps being paged by “Lucille.”

He was instructed that he would
have to call her and tell her to stop paging him.

“She don’t never leave no number,
so I can’t call her back,” he said.

After three such calls,
someone thought to ask how
he knew it was Lucille if she didn’t leave a number.

“She leaves her name,” was the reply.

After establishing that the customer
had a numeric-only pager, the light bulb came on.

“How does she spell her name?” the service rep asked.

“L-O-W C-E-L-L”

Another technical problem solved.

Ha Ha Ha Ha Hah!